The beating music of the rain has picked up with unfortunate timing. Standing by recent patterns, I'm tired during the day but can't get enough of the night. No one is awake and there are endless things to do.
Search the internet. Read the news & intrigue. Organize anything/everything. Pour cereal. Read exciting novels. Write. Write. Watch 1 of my fav TV series. Trash texts to open memory. Paint toe nails. Pummice feet. Write. Play with my hair. Become inspired & make random food. Experiment with cooking. Donate to compost. Go for a walk. Go for a drive. Ponder my bank account. Make lists of finances. Make to-do lists. Organize previous lists. Sort miscellaneous drawer(s). Prepare folios. Prepare binder's board. Measure. Cut. Measure. Cut. Roll eyes and glue. Sew, sew, sew. Braid & bead. Take pictures of creations. Take pictures of random shit... for the sheer hell of it.
Something about December discombobulates desires. I want to sleep but the alarm clock goes off. I want to go to work but it's not time. I want to visit friends but I'm too exhausted to fake excitement. I want, I want, I want but I didn't shower because I wanted to do something else. It's lunch time but I'm not hungry but I'll cook anyway & end up cooking too much & hate myself sooner than later.
I want something and I don't know what it is. I do know I don't want to want. I'm pushing myself to be a machine, per say, and workworkwork until everything is phenomenal. My retail job, my binding orders, my laundry, etc.
And I've finally developed a sleepy-head. I can only pray I will wake early (and decide to stay awake) to pursue a Sun Salutation. Perhaps it will be a stronger healthier footstep to begin the day.
Bon voyage mes reveurs familliar!
Search the internet. Read the news & intrigue. Organize anything/everything. Pour cereal. Read exciting novels. Write. Write. Watch 1 of my fav TV series. Trash texts to open memory. Paint toe nails. Pummice feet. Write. Play with my hair. Become inspired & make random food. Experiment with cooking. Donate to compost. Go for a walk. Go for a drive. Ponder my bank account. Make lists of finances. Make to-do lists. Organize previous lists. Sort miscellaneous drawer(s). Prepare folios. Prepare binder's board. Measure. Cut. Measure. Cut. Roll eyes and glue. Sew, sew, sew. Braid & bead. Take pictures of creations. Take pictures of random shit... for the sheer hell of it.
At 3a.m. these things are enticing.
At 3a.m. these things feel dire...
Something about December discombobulates desires. I want to sleep but the alarm clock goes off. I want to go to work but it's not time. I want to visit friends but I'm too exhausted to fake excitement. I want, I want, I want but I didn't shower because I wanted to do something else. It's lunch time but I'm not hungry but I'll cook anyway & end up cooking too much & hate myself sooner than later.I want something and I don't know what it is. I do know I don't want to want. I'm pushing myself to be a machine, per say, and workworkwork until everything is phenomenal. My retail job, my binding orders, my laundry, etc.
And I've finally developed a sleepy-head. I can only pray I will wake early (and decide to stay awake) to pursue a Sun Salutation. Perhaps it will be a stronger healthier footstep to begin the day.
Bon voyage mes reveurs familliar!
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